A friend reminded me of something I wrote this time last year.....

The hottest English July day since records began was recorded yesterday when temperatures reached 36.5c(97.3f).

It didn't drop much below that throughout the night and if such things were recorded, it was probably the most sleepless night in British history as well. I tried every method to get there - book, shower, movie, shower, book in shower - all to no avail. I think I might have taken more Valium since my records began which I guess the sweat must have diluted because I sure wasn't going to sleep.

In a vague attempt to recreate a Coke ad I remember in the 80's where a sweltering New York bonds over an ice cool drink in the middle of the night, I went for a walk. As I suspected, I wasn't alone. Most of West London had also given up trying and were walking dogs, hanging out on front steps, watching late night quiz shows (check the ratings, I bet they went sky high) chatting across front fences and wandering, as I was, like an extra from Day of the Dead. Indeed there was something vaguely post-apocalyptic about it. In a cute kind of community way of course.

This was four in the morning.

I returned home to find the usual hoodies hanging out at the top of my road. We don't bother each other the hoodies and I. We have an unwritten, unspoken agreement - I don't shop them for dealing whatever they deal and they don't burgle my house. So far so good.

Whether it was the heat, the time in the morning or the brand of south American Montezuma they had selected this fine morning, their behaviour seemed somehow different. They were huddled closer and more intimately round my car than I would have liked. A flash decision was made, say nothing. I gave them the usual nod and grunt and they returned the compliment. What the hell, I'm insured to the eyeballs and a VW Golf 1.6 is so last year in the world of the joy-rider. I slept fine.

Waking this morning I peaked out the curtains first thing. Still hot, car fine.

Well, not exactly. A missing hub cap had inexplicably appeared on my car.

Let me be really clear on this. I lost a hub cap mounting a kerb about two months ago. I've lost a lot of hub caps mounting a lot of kerbs over the years, but this being a relatively new car, grated with me a little. I notice it everyday. The hub cap had undoubtedly been neatly and cleanly affixed to my car. I've run through all the options, possibilities and misunderstandings, but this I am sure on. No hub yesterday, hub today. I am bewildered, and refuse to believe that this was a direct result of Cameron's hug a hoodie speech. Various suggestions have been made, such as a hub cap is just the first step to get me to try crack, but I equally refuse to believe that as well.

They were just the goodwill hoodies who thought my hubless car was bringing down the neighbourhood. That, or the heat really did get to them. They say it'll be even hotter next week. I look forward to a new DVD player.